Yes...It's been awhile. I apologize for this. However, a million things have happened, and I am sad to say Siren has been lost. I got a new Dell laptop specifically for writing, and once i started getting ideas the old Siren was no where to be found not on DA not in my email, not in any old files on the old computer. It is gone...all 70 or more pages...vanished into thin air. I cried...that was the base on which I was making it better. I know, half of the people that read this thing "dont you just remember what you wrote?" Sadly no, I have never really been able to remember what I have written.

A few amazing things did happen, I for the first time at the age of 18 went on a plane. And not only did I get on a plane, I got to visit Slovakia & Hungary. The love of my life was born in Slovakia and moved to the US at the age of 3. Talk about amazing, I fell in love with a country, and the culture, even most of the people.

Oddly, even being so young I can't figure out why i crave to have my own family, and am ready to be so much older than I am. I take of a lot of things already, been through so much already, I just want something steady and amazing. I know I love someone with all my heart and if I had two hearts I'd love him with both of them. I know I can spend the rest of my life with him, but how do I seperate myself from him if he doesn't want the same thing?